The wind blew gently, sweetened by the fragrant aroma of pixie burps.
— Stanton Fenwick (our national treasure)
He raised some cash by selling a kidney (not his own) and hit the road.
— The Venerable Fenwick
He studied her face with a kindly smile, feigning interest to seem considerate. He thought her latest nose was the best yet.
— Stanton Fenwick : Painter of Prose
The last person who tried to fact-check him is still missing.
— Key witness in the Fenwick Trial
Out on bail. Back on Kindle.
— Good Ole Fenwick
Just stay in your house, as ordered.
— Stanton Fenwick’s Parole Officer
Or not.
— Stanton “Legs” Fenwick
I’m sorry, señor. A warrant has been issued for your arrest. Under these circumstances, we cannot permit you entry.
— Bolivian Airport Immigration Official
Words cannot express my regret, Your Honor. I was irresponsible. From now on, I promise to obey the court’s orders.
— A very contrite Fenwick gets an ankle monitor
As reliable as mosquitoes following a rain, the critics arrived.
— The maestro Fenwick
Can you imagine what Van Gogh’s ear would go for at auction today? And that woman he gave it to probably just threw it away.
— Furiously scribbled note by Stanton’s therapist
Stanton Fenwick 